Stupid names pay dividends

17:39 Tue 25 March 2008

If you're a celeb, it goes without saying you'll call your kids something really really stupid. In all reality a simple Jon, or Dave, or Ann, would just never cut it.

And looks like it doesn't cut it in the real world anymore either. According to a new survey on the science of names, the dafter the moniker, the higher up the food chain a person will eventually scrabble.

Which could mean the Beckhams have been playing a cunning tactical hand in the baby name stakes all along. Or that when Jordan and Peter plumped for Princess Tiáamii they had more than just the chuckle factor in mind.

Elsewhere in the survey, people with first names of royal conotations, like Charles, James, Elizabeth, etc were deemed more intelligent and more 'succesful'. And women with names ending in an 'ee' vowel sound, like Sophie, or Katie - more attractive. Ryan, oddly, came out tops in the sexy boys name charts - which lauds those which short, sharp names and penalises those with long. Isn't life fickle.

Check out our all time favourite celeb crap names. Which is your favourite?

Moon Unit, Dweezil Zappa and Diva Muffin- courtesy of 60's pyschadelic musician Frank Zappa

Moxie Crimefighter - Penn Jilette

Zoey Bowie (later changed to Duncan Jones) - David Bowie

Rumer Glenn, Scout Larue and Tallulah Belle - Demi Moore and Bruce Willis

Jigme - Richard Gere and Carey Lowell

Fifi Trixabelle, Peaches and Pixie - Bob Geldof

Banjo Patrick - Rachel Griffiths

Sage Moonblood - Sylvester Stallone

Camera - Arthur Ashe (tennis player)

Seven Sirius and Puma - Erykah Badu

Denim Cole and Diezel Ky - Toni Braxton